Sunday, December 20, 2009

Now the worst movies of 2009

Now it's time for the worst of the worst movies this year..

Dragonball z.
Are there people out there who still watch dragonball? In it's heyday this movie would have killed at the box office, but that popularity was way back in 1996. Meaning that it's target market didn't get laid if they took a date to see this. Who okayed this movie, I want to stick a vegeta figure up his ass.

Next day air
Ok, take the script from Guy ritchie's Lock,stock and two smoking barells and Snatch, Mesh them together, put an urban environment, add some of the worst black and hispanic stereotypes and you have this dumb ass movie. The blacks act like lazy asses, smoke weed and don't get anything right, The hispanics dress slutty and cook eggs all day and have guns, What the hell? This movie could've worked if you take the whole script, edit it out and put in a new script and get a different director.

Legend of Chun-li
Ummm, yeah not only is street fighter super dead, but who the fuck cares? Is it me or everyone from black eye peas is getting way too much exposure (The chinese guy plays vega), What is this story about...umm...Chun-li doing stuff and fighting vega and umm other stuff. Trust me, you won't care, This movie is about 15 years too late, Hadooocrap!

OOOkay, let's see, A happily married couple's lives are torn apart by a woman who puts the moves on the unsuspecting husband. But now get this, the other woman is white and the married couple happen to be african american, And you know how that goes, The story balances the thin line between racial tension and happens to upstage it with incredible acts of ineptitude and scenes that would never happen in real life, Is the white woman smarter while everyone else seem to have absolutely no control of any situation? That is until beyonce takes off her shoes and throws that bitch down thru a ceiling with a chandelier in tow. Boooyah!

I dont know anything about this movie because i refused to see it, if it has Cuba and Val kilmer that shit went straight to video. I didn't even bother to see if it came out this year. Nice photoshop job, Fuck you.

Transformers 2
Oh damn, This movie is so noisy and annoying you'd want to rip your ears off, same lead characters who are not worth mentioning with the addition of new robots makes this movie a sure thing, That is until you have to sit thru a stale script and annoying robots especially the two who jive talk and take african american robots to a new low (if there were any), damn. Who thinks of this shit. Because you know, word out in Hollywood is that buffoonery sells.

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